Skripper Time

A Year in the Blink of an Eye

Baby A, 10 minutes old

A year ago, if you told me that my year of maternity leave would seemingly disappear into a time warp, I probably wouldn't have believed you.  With a newborn on my arm, a year seemed like a lifetime.  Yet, here I am on the eve of my return to work, in mild denial, experiencing mild anticipation and feeling some pretty major mixed feelings.

Some people told me that by six months I would be dying to get back to work.  Not this Mama.  I loved every minute of mat leave.  Upon reflection, I think mine was a little different than most first-time mothers.  With Avery's three brothers part-time at home, I had little down time over the past year.  When I would tell the new mothers in my Mommy groups that we also had three little guys I would be met with wide-eyed stares, murmurs of astonishment and a few glances of something between awe and pity.

Avery and I had a great year - watching her grow, change, define her personality - it all amazed me at every step of the way.  She made friends...Jacob, JJ, all the babes at our Mom's groups.  We travelled to England, Edmonton and Orlando. We walked and walked with Auntie Sarah, Avery joined me in training for my half marathon, and she met all her friends and family along the way. 

For the most part, she was an easy baby, which I know is a gift, and I know made my life somewhat easier, and for that I am thankful. Because she slept, I was able to get things done:  laundry, showering, baking, cooking, cleaning and more. She would hit the pillow and I would go into overdrive.  Sometimes more than I should have...I regret not having taken a little more time to relax while she was sleeping.  Live and learn.

Things I am going to miss when I return to work:  The daily sweet cling of my baby after her morning nap, the way she clamps onto her spoon at lunch and holds it in mid air, laughing her head off.  I'm going to miss seeing her discover something new and laugh in delight.  And yes, I know that I will still have a million moments with her and lifetime of awesomeness, but it is the daily wonder that I am already missing. 

She is at a wonderful daycare and will be nurtured and cared for there, and I will return to the world of digital marketing, and have grown up conversations and make very-important-strategic-decisions but oh how I will miss being my baby's daily and constant source of comfort, fun and joy.  It is a hard hard thing to relinquish the development and safety of your child to a group of strangers, no matter how competent and excellent they are.

It will all be ok - and I know that I'll find a new routine that works, and this is just how it has to be (mortgage, retirements, bills...all those pesky things that require income).  I'll put away my yoga pants and stretchy tops in favour of heels and business attire.  I'll eat more than just peanut butter and toast, chunks of mangos and cheerios for lunch.  But the damp, hot press of Avery's cheek against mine after waking, the sudden tight squeeze when she throws her arms around my neck when we walk downstairs, and her delighted screech after she opens and closes her door for the twentieth time...it is so hard to leave that behind.

 

10 Things New Moms Need to Know

Why hello there!  As I was lying in bed last night, I started running through a list of things that I wish someone had drilled into my head when I was in the first 6 weeks of babyland. So here they are, plus a couple of extra for good measure.

1. Pre-Moistened Facial Wipes. Get some. When you are standing bleary eyed, exhausted in front of the bathroom mirror before something previously known as bedtime (which now will be anytime between 7pm and 4am) you will feel slightly more human because you have cleaned your face. Forget the exfoliator, cleanser, toner nonsense. Just swipe and fall into bed.
2. Get Outside Everyday. Even if it is just to the end of the block. Take the baby with you - in a stroller, in a sling or in your arms. You will both benefit from the fresh air, and you will remember that the world is still going on outside your front door.
3. Say Yes to All Help. Someone offers to walk the dog, make you dinner, clean the house or tidy your closet....whatever. Someone offers to help, the answer should always be YES.
4. Witch Hazel. Get some. It works wonders.
5. Rest. I did more than I should have in the first 6 weeks and twice my body reminded me that I had just had a baby by completely shutting down. Most of the time I felt pretty good and I had a pretty well behaved baby. As a consequence, I was up and running around more than I should have been until WHAMMO! full body meltdown. So even if you feel good, take it easy.
6. Bake a Lot of Muffins and Freeze Them. Or better yet, get someone to bake them for you. Do this before you give birth. If you are breastfeeding you will hunt down food (especially carbs) like the folks in Clan of the Cave Bear. At all times of the day and night. Having semi-healthy food handy is critical.
7. Drink Lots of Water. Especially critical for breast feeders. After every feed, drink a big glass of water. Pursuant to #6, you will also have the thirst of the desert. I got carpal tunnel badly in both wrists and had to wear splints to bed - armed with those I would chug a huge bottle of water just before bedtime, gulping like a dehydrated hockey player. So sexy.
8. Get Some Digital Entertainment. Your Kindle, iPhone, iPad, etc will be your new best friend. Breast feeding for hours on end is so much better with digital entertainment. I have played more Scrabble on my iPhone in the last 8 months than I care to admit. And by the way, Kindles, iPhones and iPads make GREAT push presents. You listening, Daddios?
9. Take Lots of Photos. Everyone told me this and it is true. Babies are tiny for an instant and then suddenly they have 8 teeth, are yanking on your hair and blowing raspberries full of puréed chicken and sweet potato on your face. Take a million photos the whole way through.
10. Learn to Say No. This goes back to #5. Everyone wants to see your baby - but most of the time in the early days the baby will be sleeping which means you will be the one entertaining. No dice, mama. If you're tired - decline politely and don't feel a bit bad about it. Or better yet, tell them that you have some laundry they can do while you have a nap.
11. Enjoy. It's amazing, tiring, confusing, wonderful and all together incredible. And it will fly by - so treasure every moment.
    
    That's certainly not the whole list, but it is a good start. Hopefully it will help some of the new mamas out there. Anyone have anything to add?